Philippians

The Positive Side of Illness, Fatigue, and Physical Pain

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I wrote this over a month ago in the midst of a physically trying moment and didn’t have the energy to edit it into a post.  I’m now 21 weeks pregnant, and have been feeling much better: nausea only in the evenings, less fatigue, and the comfort of feeling our little one move and remembering why I’m doing this.

This is what I wrote ten weeks ago:

I’ve pretty much been sick all eleven weeks of my pregnancy, minus a few great days here and there.  I’ve had the flu; I’ve had a long-lasting cough that threatened premature contractions; and the normal pregnancy symptoms (nausea, headaches, fatigue) have been enough to deal with on their own.

But while my tolerances have been stretched, this has also been an excellent opportunity for me to see my spiritual weaknesses and to fully depend on the Lord.

There is nothing like having the areas we most depend on ripped out from under us.  I’ve always been physically pretty healthy, and didn’t realize how much I’d pulled comfort and strength from my place of good health.  Having almost constant pain lately has been quite humbling.  I’ve also become aware of other areas in my spirit that need spiritual transformation, which likely would have gone unnoticed without this ‘forced fasting’.

For the first time, I think I’m understanding the spiritual directive to have joy within suffering–to count it my blessing when I experience trials (James 1:2-4, 2 Cor 12:7-10, Phil 4:11).  I’m not sure there’s a way to articulate this concept, but it is certainly a blessing to experience such a joy.  I have especially have fond memories of spending hours vomiting with intermittent praises to the Lord, and though I also don’t want that pain again anytime soon, it’s really quite amazing that I’d even think in such a way.

To my friends who are also facing physical trials: I want to encourage you not to pray immediately for healing or a ‘fixed’ circumstance, but to first press into the raw love of the Lord.  I have frequently been blessed with sudden immediate healing from the Lord upon praying–there is definitely a place for this and it can increase our faith in a miracle working God.  But let the Spirit lead you to pray before you assume you know what’s best.  I have occasionally been lead to pray for other things: for endurance and strength to face the trial, for the physical manifestation of the Lord’s love and peace, for wisdom and revelation of who He is, for heart, soul and spirit to be transformed into His nature, for the ability to rest in Him despite the circumstance, and so forth.  Sometimes the answers to heart issues are much more rewarding than the healing of the physical issues.

I pray we would not miss out on any of the Lord’s gifts, even when they come in painful packages.  There is a time and a season for everything under heaven (Eccl 3).

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Verses on Spiritual Warfare (Part Two: Strengthening Before Battle)

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Coming from an athletic family, I like to call these the “defensive” verses.  They focus on what to do before the spiritual attack comes–how to “put on the armor of God” so you aren’t shaken when the battle shifts to your home front.  It is not, by any means a ‘complete’ list, but rather a sample of the verses I’ve collected through my experiences.

The themes are:

1. Remain in Christ by connecting deeply with Him

  • Read scripture
  • Test all things and remain only in Truth
  • Pray in the Spirit
  • Be on the alert through watching and praying

2. Stop remaining in that which is not Christ

  • Battle now against your flesh, so you can battle later against the enemy of this world
  • If you know you’re in sin (disobedience to God), do everything you can to get out
  • Sacrifice the things that aren’t beneficial even if they aren’t ‘bad’

Verses on How to Fight the Defensive Battle:

“Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord” (Colossians 3:16).

“This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written in it.  For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success” (Joshua 1:8).

“All things are lawful for me, but not all things are profitable.  All things are lawful for me, but I will not be mastered by anything” (1 Corinthians 6:12).

“Finally, brethren, whatever is true…let your mind dwell on these things” (Philippians 4:8).

“Stand firm therefore, having girded your loins with truth” (Ephesians 6:14).

“The night is almost gone, and the day is near.  Therefore let us lay aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of  light…put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts” (Romans 13:12 & 14).

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might.  Put on the full armor of God, that you may be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil.  For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.  Therefore, take up the full armor of God, that you may be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm” (Ephesians 6:10-13; continue through verse 17 for specifics).

“With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints” (Ephesians 6:18).

“Pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17).

“So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in Him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.  See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ” (Colossians 2:6-8).

“Let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall.  No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.  Therefore, my beloved, flee from idolatry” (1 Corinthians 10:12-14).

“Keep watching and praying that you may not come into temptation; the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak” (Mark 14:38).

“Run in such a way that you may win…I run in such a way, as not without aim; I box in such a way, as not beating the air; but I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified” (1 Corinthians 9:24, 26-27).

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It’s a spiritual battle

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Last night and earlier today I was under intense spiritual attack.  It began after I’d experienced great victory with the Lord, and it was so sudden and unexpected that I was feeling weak, depressed, lonely, physically sick, exhausted, …, all at once and couldn’t quite remember how to deal with it (even though I counsel my good friends on spiritual warfare on a regular basis).

I reached out to a few people for prayer, I considered that I should be praying for strength, or taking authority over the lies of the enemy, and yet I continued to engage negative thoughts and wallow.

Then a friend spoke to me and mentioned something like, “it’s okay, we all feel down sometimes”.  I can’t explain what happened in my spirit, but it was like Truth rose up inside me and my spirit shouted, “No! It’s not true!  It’s a spiritual battle!  I’ve been up against this before and won!”

Too often we give our flesh credit for what is happening in the spiritual realm.  But Ephesians 6:12 says “Our battle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.”  When we feel anger, or sadness, or fear, or hopelessness or any other negative thought it is a spiritual thing.  There are deceptive spirits speaking lies to us.  It doesn’t matter how believable those negative thoughts may seem–they are all lies!

But 2 Corinthians 10 encourages us that if we have chosen Jesus Christ as our Lord, then we have spiritual weapons available to us through the Holy Spirit: “For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh, for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses.”

Our job is to “take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ” (2 Cor 10:5).  When we hear ourselves thinking a thought that is in any way negative or outside the nature of our Lord, we choose to cast it aside.  We recognize that it’s false, claim the truth, and let the truth sink into our spirits setting us free (Phil 4:8).

This is exactly what I chose to do this evening, and I’ll testify that there is nothing better than the fruit of the Spirit (Gal 5:22-23), and complete freedom in the Lord.  If you’re a Christian, this is absolutely available to you all the time, no matter the circumstance; but you do have to choose to resist the temptation and lies of the devil!

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